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Dear Mamma/My Day With You

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Dear Mamma, Today marks eleven years since we said “see ya later”. I’ve lived longer on this earth without you than with you. It’s a mind blowing and heartbreaking realization. I’ve learned so much from you, both in life and in memory. You taught me what it means to live for Christ. Your life full of serving Him through serving your children and “your kids” in your youth group. Watching you put time into preparing lessons for them taught me the importance of teaching others. Reading your journals taught me the importance of daily prayer and quiet time with Christ.Your life, while not perfect, was a light pointing to the Savior that you loved so much. Your prayers for us to come to know Him a testimony to your complete faith.  Your memory is no longer infused into the places I walk on a daily basis, for Springfield is a place you never lived. But it’s infused in the pages of your journals, and in the Bible you marked up just for me. I no longer feel the pain of missing you every day, bu
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His Total Sovereignty > My Totaled Car

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2/21/19 The concept of God’s total sovereignty is one that is so hard to grasp. Yet, as I was running late on Thursday morning it was something that I was thinking about. As I was rushing around trying to get ready-frustrated at myself for oversleeping-I wondered if there was a reason . Between waking up late and having to gather props for a rehearsal that night, I was fifteen minutes behind when I finally left . As I drove to work, I wondered if this was one of those things where God makes you late to protect you from an accident or something . This, however , wasn’t exactly the case. When I was a little over halfway to work, waiting to turn at a stoplight, my small Toyota Echo was hit by a large Jeep. The driver thought I was going when I’d decided to wait for one more car. At first, I was shocked . It took me a moment to even breathe as I tried to take stock of the information surrounding me. My car was dinging, I thought a couple of things might be blinking, and when I tried
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Consumption

Recently I’ve noticed something quite troubling in my life. Working to take in information (reading) or working to create (writing, drawing, even just using a drawing app on my phone!) takes much more energy than it did when I was younger. When writing, the brain power required drains me of energy after about an hour. When reading, I don’t tend to last even that long. Yet I will listen for hours. I’ll listen to a short, 4-6 hour audio book, in a day or two. I’ll listen to my chronological Bible reading plan much more willingly than I’ll read it. I even find myself trying to find audio of textbooks so that I can listen while I read. Apparently, I think this will help me focus. Because that’s what it comes down to—focus. Tonight, when presented with reading in a textbook or watching a video for the same class, I choose to watch the video. Not because it was any more exciting, but because I just wanted to sit passively and receive rather than work and process to understand information. I
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Something a Little Random

  So, this week has been a little bit hectic, and when I finally get a chance to sit down and work on the blog I don’t have the journal with the already filled out prompts with me. So, I pulled this prompt from Pinterest. According to the pin, it originally came from inspirationeverywhere.blogspot.com , possibly in June of 2011. I thought it was super cute, fun, and simple, so decided to give it a shot! Currently. . . One: I am currently thinking that my glasses are making my eyes more dry (or maybe my eyeliner), and I’d really like my eye drops. I’m going to have to go find them. I’m also thinking about school and what I have to get done tomorrow after my keyboard charges! (It died, and I took it as a sign that homework was done for tonight, at least until after church. I’m typing this on my iPad and it’s not my favorite thing!) Two: I’m currently enjoying my Intro Old Testament class. I’ve just finished chapter one and already I’m learning so much I didn’t know about the txt that I’
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Love Languages

I’ve been thinking a lot about love languages recently, thanks to a chapter in "the psychology workbook for writers" by Darian Smith that I’ve been reading as a way to improve my characters. I think I’ve narrowed down my most fluent love languages down to two ways that I tend to show and sometimes interpret love. First, I’ve noticed that one way I show love is through “acts of service”. This makes itself most noticeable at work, but does come out in other areas of my life. I’ve always been one that found it hard to say no, and I do enjoy serving others. I find that when serving someone that I know and love, the act of service becomes an act of love. For instance, at work. I work in the infant room of a daycare, and I’d known the teacher that I work with for several years before I started the job. We both share a love for coffee, though she prefers hers black most days and I absolutely must have cream and sugar. It’s a rare morning when she gets to the classroom having al
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My Writing Space: The Reality

At first this was going to be a post detailing my current writing space versus my ideal writing space, but I realize that I need to work with what I have to get to a place of contentment until I actually have the space to create the environment that I want. My desk is an old metal students desk that I think we got from teh family that used to rent out the house that we are now in. I’ve used this desk for yers, gotten rid of it more than once (exiled to my brothers room where it never got used), but I always come back to it in the end. I’ve limited my “sitting” space at the desk by putting a filling cabinet under the desk to my left, where I intend on keeping the majority of my writing books/notebooks and also my school books/notebooks. I’ve got an old book that’s been cut into an “A” in the right corner of my desk, along with a Willow Tree forgive of what I assume is a mother and a daughter sitting on a bench and talking. In the left corner I have my Amazon Echo Dot and a Willow Tree k
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Ten Life Lessons Learned (So Far)

With today jump starting a new year, a new chapter, and a new opportunity for adventure, I thought I’d share the product of a journaling prompt I’ve filled out recently. Ten life lessons that I have learned so far in my 21 1/2 years on this earth. They’re not in any particular order, just in the order that they came to me. 1) It’s okay to trust people; it’s okay to open up and be vulnerable. Yes, you’re putting you heart on the line, but it’s worth it because you find the people that will never leave you. 2) Sometimes you’re going to get hurt. Sometimes there’s nothing that you can say or do to fix it. You simply have to feel it, work through it, and move on from it. No, it’s not easy-but it never is. It’s better to move on than to hold onto that pain. 3) Sometimes you’re going to hurt others. Sometimes you can fix it, but sometimes you can’t. When you can’t fix it, learn from it. Apologize,be sincere, but if you can’t fix it don’t dwell on it. 4) Cry when you need to, but don’t make y
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